Monday, August 8, 2011

How to Forgive?



God says, “I--yes, I alone--will blot out your sins for my own sake and will never think of them again.” Isaiah 43:25, The Bible.

Has anyone ever hurt you so badly that you feel that you could never fully forgive?
It could be a boss who humiliated you or a colleague who disrespected you.
It may have been a lover who walked out on you, or a friend who betrayed you.
It could be a spouse who cheated on you, or a stranger who offended you.
It might be a trusted person who sexually abused you, or a family member who took advantage of you.


Whoever it may be, the hurt lingers on for a long time and the scars remain as a memory forever.

The question is, can we forgive?


Humanly speaking, I believe we can never forget something traumatic in our lives, which makes it very difficult to forgive.
There are wise words which say, “To heal another, forgive yourself first.”



But how do we do that, when we ourselves are flawed? We can forgive by choice, but WE can never fully forgive, because we will definitely think of their mistakes again!


Only GOD can fully forgive and never think of the mistakes again.
Why? Because we are all equal sinners, saved by grace. Only GOD is sinless.


How can we learn how to forgive?

It is only by imitating the ONE PERSON who CAN FULLY FORGIVE.
To learn to FORGIVE, we need to learn from GOD.



He always existed since the beginning. He came to the earth through virgin birth. He lived a 100% sinless life –a perfect example to us. He sacrificed His life on the cross. He paid with His own blood for our sins - because ALL of us were sinners and have caused God great anger! This person is none other than Jesus Christ.




The ONLY WAY to save us from God’s JUDGEMENT, was FORGIVENESS!




The only way to save us from eternal punishment in hell is by forgiving us.



Look at it this way.


When someone hurts us, WE feel that WE have the right to be angry and upset.
Why? Because WE are ‘playing God’.
Do you get what I mean?


Being created by God, we have His attributes of goodness, and righteous anger towards wrongdoings. God said, “Let us make man in our image and likeness...” (Genesis 1:26). We have the imprint of our Father in heaven. To a large extent, WE know GOOD from bad, even if we are not religious.



When someone does something bad to us, WE wear the hat of GOD, sit down on our throne and start passing the judgment!



Like a judge looking at the criminal, WE say, “On such and such a day, time and year, YOU are guilty of doing this and this to ME. For this, your punishment is, “I’ll never talk to you again, I will not see your face at all cost, I will hate you every time I think of it, I will revenge when I have the chance. I will give you poor work evaluation if I am your boss. I will talk behind your back and let the whole world know about your sins, etc…”



The only way for this ‘criminal’ to escape YOUR JUDGEMENT is through YOUR FORGIVESS.



Forgiveness happens when you say, “Yes, you are guilty of this crime, but I forgive you. You escape the punishment. You are free!”



We really take after our Father in Heaven – GOD.



God operates on the same concept. In Romans 6:23, it is written, “The wages of sin is death, but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus…” The death referred to here is physical and spiritual death. We die in our earthly bodies, and after that a sinner’s spirit is condemned to hell. We deserved this punishment. Death is the repayment for sins.



When God created humankind, He made us perfect in every way. He intended for us to be sinless to enjoy His company. Yet, we humans choose to disobey and follow after evil -




Read the book of Genesis in the Bible:





Being the gentleman that He is, God never forces us to follow Him. He gives us free will.



When God looks down at you and me from His throne in heaven, He has a huge record of ALL our wrongdoings since we were born. ALL of us have sinned.



We might think, “I am not a rapist, a murderer or a thief… I just live my life, I don’t hurt others…I am not such a bad sinner…Those in the prisons are sinners, not me.”



But that’s not how God sees us – whether we are guilty of killing someone, sleeping around like a prostitute, simply telling a lie, gossiping about someone or just having lewd imaginations of someone who is not your spouse – God sees inside our heart and mind. Sin is sin - doesn’t matter if it’s big or small.



God’s standards are super high, and He has a right to that because He is sinless. Unlike us, who set high standards for others to comply to, while we are still sinners. Truly, we deserve to ‘go to hell!”



Yet, GOD CHOSE to FORGIVE us from His anger and punishment – Jesus paid it all on the cross.



Nothing was required from you and me, except to BELIEVE and ACCEPT the FORGIVENESS.



The only way for us to ESCAPE GOD’S JUDGEMENT is THROUGH HIS FORGIVENESS.



We have a great privilege to ACCEPT His gift of forgiveness, and enjoy His company, both on earth and in the life here after.

When you understand that you are just as sinful as the one who hurt you, then you will realize that you need forgiveness as much as the other person does.


When you realize just how much you have been forgiven by God, and you accept that forgiveness, then you can freely forgive.

Because when God’s love flows in and through you – it is His LOVE that FORGIVES. Not your sinful self. Only GOD’s LOVE which is PERFECT can change your tears of resentment and pain into joy.


JESUS said, in Matthew 10:8:
“….Freely you have received, freely give.”


*If you believe that Jesus Christ died for your sins, SAY this with your mouth, and BELIEVE in your heart.



“Dear Jesus, I confess I am a sinner. I believe You died on the cross to pay for my sins. Please forgive me. I accept your forgiveness. Thank You for loving me in spite of all my wrongdoings. I am a child of God. In the same way, I forgive everyone who has hurt me. In Jesus’ Name, Amen.”

Be assured that you are forgiven! :) Now, for God’s sake, freely forgive! :)

By JJ.








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